Strolling into the eye doctor’s waiting room, it didn’t take me long to realize I was in the presence of another relaxed and seasoned homeschool mom and her two boys. Her boys were engaged in creative and intelligent conversation together. They weren’t afraid to talk to me and shared what they were learning from a book they were reading. I was delighted to enter into discussion with them. No empty, blank stares or pretending I didn’t exist. These children were bright, lively and excited to share the moment with me.
NOTE: This article is a guest post written by Jeannie Gerhardt. Read more about her at the end of this post!
As we chatted, I realized I had heard of this veteran homeschool mom. It was Tauna Meyer from OCEANetwork and Proverbial Homemaker. I enjoyed sharing a few lessons I’d learned along the way and some of the following stories of how I got into homeschooling. Tauna asked if I’d be willing to share them with the homeschool community on the OCEANetwork site.
Engaging in discussions with other moms is so important. It helps us to know we’re not alone, and that we can mutually encourage one another as we’ve gone through similar feelings. As we watch others make it through their homeschooling years, we know that we will too. Some days we soar, and some days we might flounder, but it’s nice to know we’re all in this together doing the best we can.
Provoking a new Path in Education
In the fall of 2004, my first child turned 5. I decided it was time to walk him down to the new school and get him registered. When I arrived at the open house, a police officer walked out of the building and shook my hand, introducing himself. He explained that he had his own office right inside the elementary school. I must have stood open-mouthed because he kept talking and telling me how nice it was that parents could ask him for help to straighten out their kids. I smiled politely and turned around without ever setting foot in that school.
I remember entertaining my first few thoughts on whether I could try this thing called homeschooling. Each new year brought the same, “I’ll give this a try,” kind of thinking. Soon it developed into what I would call a conviction and call from the Lord to persevere. That was the start of a long, adventurous, and joy-filled journey in educating my children at home and on the move.
My family and I experienced a lot of upheaval over the years, including 4 C-sections, children with medical issues, too many moves to count, and family drama. So much so that I sometimes wonder if our homeschool was ever truly consistent during those years. But the one thing that fueled me was getting up early in the morning for my personal devotions and prayer, along with a cup of coffee.
Staying Plugged Into the Right Power Source
God consistently gave me the strength to read His word to my children, pray with them, and discuss spiritual lessons early every morning before chores and school. I quickly learned if we didn’t set other things down, we’d never pick up the Word of God. It’s a sacrifice. I Cor. 3:11 says, “For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.” The Bible says our work will be tested by fire.
We have choices to make when it comes to what we build into the lives of our children. Houses will come and go. The curriculum becomes outdated. We learn new strategies and ways of being more efficient. But one thing never changes, the value of the Word of God. We need to remember that investing our time and energy into reading God’s Word, chewing on it, thinking about, and referencing it during our days with our children, is what makes it real and relevant to their lives. God is the only one that has been in our children’s future, and we need to remember that.
Building Relationships Is Ministry
Building onto this foundation of Jesus Christ, I added hospitality in the way of hosting dinners and events including ministry with CEF© (Child Evangelism Fellowship). I felt like this helped my children grow into whole people, concerned for the welfare of those around them. When you let your kids help plan and host meals and events, your children learn all kinds of social skills. When all my kids reached their teens, I encouraged them to receive training at CYIA© camp (Christian Youth in Action) which is a CEF© sponsored summer mission program for teens. They learn to lead and teach children the gospel. I battled against the prevailing thought of our culture that teens are just lazy and mope about with bad attitudes. They don’t have to, but often they will if not challenged to greatness.
Teens need to be taught to give of themselves in service to God. We don’t have what it takes to navigate the future as parents because we’ve never been there, but remember, God has! Life changes fast — faster than ever before — and time is short. Get those Bibles out every day and read. Teach your children how to dig up spiritual treasure. Be excited and in love with the Word of God and glory in all that He’s doing.
Putting Your Anchor Down for the Sake of Character
In all those years I spent trying to figure out how to educate my kids along with all those moves and upheavals I never regret having spent time in the Word of God. Even when I didn’t get anything else done that remotely looked like school I felt as though I’d succeeded in putting the most important anchor down in my day.
The truth is kids are always learning. It doesn’t have to look formal. You don’t have to be sitting down to learn. We can move about working, creating, and getting along with each other. We can help care for each other. We can encourage love and respect for one another, growing more mature together in the grace of God. You can learn how to do anything anytime you want. Don’t worry about gaps. You can always relearn what you forget but character is built over time.
Love for God is fanned into flame at a young age. Our kids will turn out well, not because we did everything right and not because they didn’t have struggles. It’s despite those struggles and mistakes that God continues to give us wisdom, mercy, and grace. We must guard against thinking that we’ve arrived and know it all. We need to continually humble ourselves before our great and mighty God and accept His wisdom and truth, leaning to reapply it in an ever-changing culture.
My kids have great attitudes; they like to work, and they like to play and go on adventures. They’re usually happy because they love God and love others. All my adult children have spent various amounts of time at community college and some at universities. Yet all of them humbly received training on the job because of their character, not because of their grades or education.
Credit them for Real Life Work and Experience
When my older kids applied for college, I was worried that I didn’t grade or track hours like a school, so I just wrote about how I had educated my kids. We traveled a lot; I wrote that down as education. We hosted and planned a lot of events. We read a ton of books. We took a handful of classes from other people. I allowed the kids a lot of freedom to experiment and create. They made lots of messes and we laughed a lot. I wrote a few paragraphs in a cover letter about each of my kids’ education and tried to list most of the books they’d studied in high school.
Colleges and Universities are different now and things are changing fast. You must be willing to learn new things all the time in an ever-changing world. Most people will need to learn to make multiple streams of income. Relax and let go of expectations that may not really matter. Hold fast to the truth that God has already been in your children’s futures. He chose you to equip them for that future. So trust Him, sit back, and enjoy the ride, pace yourself, and build into your own relationship with the Lord.
Carry on conversations about what your kids are learning not just academically but relationally and spiritually. Homeschooling is not a school, it’s an education. Worry less about tests and concern yourselves more with what kind of character is being formed and what kind of people they’re becoming. I was hard on my children when it came to things like not complaining, being honest and thankful. My older children remember me telling them often that the only thing they truly had full control over was their own attitude and that they could change it anytime they wanted.
I wasn’t so hard when it came to academics. I wanted them to understand that learning is a privilege and a blessing, something wonderful to be desired, not forced, nor something to be bullied into submission. I wanted them to enjoy learning new things and learn the rise and fall of motivation and desire. The ebb and flow of learning, digesting, packing it away in the brain and trying it all again another day.
Let Go of Fear and Idolatry
I tried to remember to let God prepare my children for their own futures. It’s letting go and trusting Him, when difficult times come and counting it as a season of growth and change. I had to learn to lower my expectations and lean into God as I discovered what was on His lesson agenda for a particular day. We’ve got to take one day at a time and do our best. All these days add up to years and when our children are gone our foundation and fulfillment will still be found in Jesus Christ.
Moms should also remember that homeschooling can leave us empty if we’re not careful. It’s simply a means to an end. Our children will leave home and start families of their own. The relationships we build with our family, friends, and neighbors are of lasting importance. Houses, cars, things, curriculum, ideas, and projects all come and go but souls are forever.
Pour the Word of God into people tirelessly. Pour God’s word into your own soul, too. Serve from this place of wholeness even in your brokenness. It’s what all the Christians who’ve gone on before us have ever done. The formula for success and happiness is still the same because God never changes. True, lasting joy and satisfaction comes from loving Him and finding all He has planned for you to be.
You’re more than a homeschooling mom. You’re a beautiful woman, created by God to glorify Him, care for and love those He’s put in your life, beautifying everything around you. Live your calling and teach your kids to do the same, remembering that God has promised, “…even to your old age I am He, and to gray hairs I will carry you. I have made, and I will bear; I will carry and will save.” (Isaiah 46:4)
Jeannie Gerhardt loves to encourage others in their walk with the Lord. She is an author, homeschool mom, and Creative Consultant located in Dallas, Oregon. She recently published her first children’s book, “The Alaskan Gingerbread,” an allegory to help children understand the difference between their own nature and the nature of God. You can visit her website at https://www.jeanniegerhardt.com/.